The One about A Time To....

Dear friends,

I think my last post was somewhat depressing, but after watching so much horrible things happening in Iraq, how can one not be depressed?

I think it would help us to keep in mind that God is in control of the world's situation. God is All-Knowing, and Wise, and so there has to be a Master Plan that God has in His hands right now. We may not be able to understand why the world has changed so much, but God does! I never imagined that I would get to see four wars in my life (Gulf War, War in Yugoslavia, War in Afghanistan, War in Iraq). Keep in mind that one of the signs of the End of the World is the increase in wars. I would love to know when I am face to face with God why He allowed to let so many innocent people die?

I was browsing through my sister's Chicken Soup for the Teenage soul, and I found a passage, which I thought perfectly captured my frame of mind. There is a time for everything in this world!

"To every thing there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under heaven.

A time to born, and a time to die;

A time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

A time to kill, and time to heal;

A time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;

A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to get and a time to lose,
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

A time to rend, and a time to sew;

A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate;

A time of war and a time of peace."

--- Eccles. 3:1-8

Surely, if we are going through a time of war now, we will also go through a time of peace. :)

Warmly,

Mansur

The One about the Reality of War

Hi all,

I just read a passage in the book I am currently reading, and it made me realize the terrrifying reality of what war is like. Sitting here in my home, watching the Iraq war unfold on the television set, I am not able to comprehend what it is like to be in a war-like situation. It is only through other people I get to know the reality of the situation. I do not believe the media broadcasters a whole lot anymore, from Fox News to Al-Jazeera. Embedded journalists are asked to mention fewer number of casualties than the actual number. Friends in Iraq tell us that a higher number of coalition forces are being killed, but the Western media is downplaying the numbers. Iraqis are going through a lot right now, which I cannot comprehend. I think the following passage gave me a good insight of what it would be like to be in war!

Here is the passage from the book Travelling with Djinns by Jamal Mahjoub, who refers to the Gulf War in 1990 in the book, and could very well apply to the present war in Iraq:

"The war began on television [...]. The picture on the screen was quite hypnotic. Necklaces of dotted light arched slowly upwards into the Baghdad sky. It was like a fireworks display, only more serene, as though it were all happening underwater. It was hard to believe that those graceful sprites were burning-hot pieces of sharp metal, tracer shells capable of killing and maiming. [...]. During the bombing, he said, it was like being in a dream from which you could never wake. Light travels faster than sound. You saw the explosion before you heard or felt it. Buildings, cars, walls, people would vanish in front of your eyes in a flash of light and smoke, and then the shock wave would hit you. He said horror was a physical thing. It gripped your entire body; some people froze, others could not stop moving. Gradually you got used to it, the air raids became part of life, like powercuts, he said. He lost his five-year-old daughter one night when the ceiling of their flat caved in."

Sincerely,

Mansur

The One about the Saudi Elections

Dear friends,

I have been following intensely the elections procedure held here in Saudi Arabia. These elections are historic, and for the first time, people could nominate themselves, and vote. However, the one glaring obvious thing is that women are not allowed to vote.

The official policy had to change "citizens can vote" to "men can vote" to steer clear of the confusion if women could vote or not. What was even more devastating was when the government announced that the "male prisoners" can also vote! I was outraged.

Many countries don't even allow for prisoners to vote, because they see prisoners as people who have lost some of their rights as citizens for the crime they committed. Yet, here in Saudi Arabia, male prisoners are given the right to vote. If I were a Saudi women, I would have been terribly upset. Society upholds male prisoners on a higher pedestal than women here. And they talk about women's equality and the better treatment they give to women than they do in the West!

Of recent there have been two journalists here in Arab News who have been discussing the pros and cons of women voting. One of them, Raid Qusti, was dead against women voting, citing that the country is not ready to have women vote (his reasons are illogical and dumb)! The other journalist, Abeer Mishkhas, writes more sensibly, and poses some great questions, and mentions the pros of having women voters. She was also upset at the fact that the male prisoners have been given the privilege to vote, whereas women have been barred.

I can only hope and pray that the women in this country get their chance to do all that the male population have been doing for so long is vote, drive and work in businesses!

Take care,

Mansur
PS if interested, check out www.arabnews.com for regular news on Saudi Arabia

The One with the Scene at the Death-bed

Hi all,

I was recently reminded of a scene from a movie that I have seen several times. The movie is caled Kal Ho Na Ho (loosely trasnslated to Tomorrow May or May Not Come-- if you think you can come up with a better translation, please let me know!)

The particular scene that I am reminded of often is the final scene, where the main character, Aman, is on the hospital bed, knowing that his heart condition will cause him to die. He knows he is going to die soon. However, the beauty of the scene is that the people who matter to him the most are all there in the hospital with him- right from his uncle to his neigbors down to his best friend and the girl he fell in love with. It sure is hard to see someone so close to death. All you want to do is grab hold of the person and bring back to this world.

What got me thinking was: How many people will come to my funeral? I think about how many people will show up when I am dead? How many people will remember me when I am gone? ALthough I am only 27 now, and I will get to know more and more people, like my future in-laws and will hopefully have kids of my own, but how many people will really come to my funeral? Will I get a chance to meet everyone before I die? Will the people who matter to me most be present at my bed side to see me off to my death?

I do not know the answers, but I do know that I am honored to have a small gruop of friends, who I know for sure will be there for me. I can envision the same scene from the movie, with me on the hospital bed, and my friends standing there. I think far too often, people always praise the deceased person after their death: "Oh, he was such a nice man," "She was very loving and always kind," and so on. What good does that do? The person is dead! I think it is important to let people know how you feel about them while they are still alive!

All right, I am off to bed, I mean work! Take care you all!

Mansur

The One with the Mineral Water Bottle Warning

(Click on the 'bottle' to open on new page to read the text!)



Doing my part to warn you of the dangers of re-using mineral water bottles! Which means I have to throw out those amazing Evian water bottles, with a hook on top! :( I used to be an environmental freak, and am still environmentally conscious today!

Here's hoping you do your part to preserve the environment,

Throwing-away-old-Evian-bottles,

Mansur

The One with My Letter to the Letters to the Editors

Dear all,

someone recently wrote an article in the letter to the editors in the Saudi Gazette. The article provoked me, and I was a little angry at someone like this person. I wrote back a reply and it got published. I did not think it would, but it has. Imagine the 1000s of people who would get to read my letter. My mom was initially upset when she saw it, but after explaining to her, she agreed with me. My dad agreed with me right from the start.

My basic problem is how some people are quick to blame others for their own ills. People in the Kingdom blame the West for all things wrong. They never take the moment to think that maybe they themselves are the ones for their ills in society. I hate people who reason like this particular person did. I was angry and upset at the level of intlorence and acceptance they have.

How can mere picture corrupt someone, unless that someone is very weak of nature in the first place. This man contradicts himself. He talks about being religious and all, and yet claims to be so easily "corrupted" by mere pics! Goes to show how strong his "faith" is!

Here is what he wrote:
(unfortunately, the paper has not yet made the newspaper available online yet!)

Here is what I replied:
http://www.saudigazette.com.sa/sgazette/Data/2004/11/11/Art_162696.XML

It is so amazing when you get to voice your opinion and it is heard!

Looking for more topics to talk about,

Mansur

The One with the Reunion After 11 Years!

Hi all!

I am really happy and delighted today. I met up with a friend and her husband after 11 years. My friend and I went together to school here in Jeddah. We were actually good friends, and even shared some of the same classes. We still fondly remember the English Literature class we took for our O'Levels. After graduation, I left for Pakistan. I still stayed in contact with her, even though it was through postal mails, since emails were not commonplace then. I left for the US, and my friend was in Canada. I had access to email in Texas and we emailed back and forth quite a lot. I left the US after my first year and came to Dubai. I lost contact with her for about five years.

It was last year when a common friend of ours told me that my friend is here from Canada. I knew my friend had married and was here in Saudi with her husband. We restablished contact, and this year we actually texted message a lot to one another over the mobile phone. Today, that day finally came when we met one another face to face.

We had dinner at Chilis. The dinner and desserts were over fast, and we spent almost an extra hour sitting at the table talking about so many things. I had an opportunity to meet's my friend's husband. What was amazing that he grew up in Mombassa, and my mom and her family also grew up in Mombassa! What a small world! However, the highlight for me was when we started reminiscening about our times in school! Teachers, classes, friends, sick notes, weird teachers, affairs, what we would do in classes and so on and on! We were actually laughing out loud. At the end of it all, our friend said 'those were the good times.' I could not have agreed with her more. Those were indeed really the good times. My friend and her husband paid for our dinner as well.

What I am amazed is that I got the opportunity to meet my friend after 11 years. I did not really think that such an opportubnity would rise. But when God has a plan, He has a plan. I am thankful for my friend, and she has been a good friend. In case, if any of you are curious, she is the one who has been leaving most of the comments on my early blog articles. Her blog, if you are interested is < www.zainahsworld.blogspot.com >

Friendship is indeed a gift in life, and I can honestly say that I witnessed the manifestation of "friendship" tonight.

Yours all delighted and smiling,

Mansur

The One About How All Our Actions Affect Those We May Not Know

A warm welcome,

I spent about two hours at the painting workshop on site today. There were only two people there, Hanif, who is a carpenter, and Aziz, who is a mason. I wanted to spend time away from my work at the office, and so joined Hanif and Aziz. They were there sanding the wood moldings, for the glass frames for the offices for the Sheikh, who is our client.

We talked about almost everything; from television, to Pakistan, to money, to food, to families, to work, to rude bosses all the way to my hearing aids. You see, Hanif is also deaf, although he has it because of old age. Hanif is nearing 70. He was 60 when he worked on the house that I live in today. Ten years ago, Hanif came to our house to fix the wooden doors for all the room. What he told me really touched my heart, and confirmed to me that all that we do in this world affects other people.

Hanif had come to our house to fix the doors. Hanif said that he was asked by my driver if he wanted anything to drink. Hanif lied and said no. he said that he felt a little bit ashamed to ask for a drink. My driver did not force anything on him. It was later, as Hanif recalled when my father came in to see the work being done, and said to my driver to bring some juice for Hanif. Hanif still rejected. Again, it was later on in the day, when my mother came and, as Hanif said, was a little upset that no drinks had been served to Hanif. My mother asked my driver to get tea and juice and something to eat.

What was amazing to me how well Hanif had remembered this incident. He said that he was so thankful to us all for the simple act of kindness we showed. I could imagine how he felt because I know for a fact that Saudis here do not usually treat people who come and work in their house with kindness and I have been a victim of such a situation as well.

Hanif’s situation reminded me of a book I finished reading. It’s called The Five People You Meet In Heaven by Mitch Albom. Very briefly, the books talks about what happens to Eddie who dies and meets five people in Heaven. These are people who are connected to Eddie in one way or another. A very cleverly written book, the underlying message is that all that we do, good or bad, affects the people around us. Often times we do not realize it, but even a smile or a simple handshake may mean the world to the other person. To hear from Hanif, ten years later, how much the actions of my mom affected him, so much so, he remembers it clearly, given his age as well, proved to me that our actions towards other have a deep and profound affect!

Yours from ready to spread kindness!

Mansur

The One About the Creepy Crawlies and Why I Am Scared of Them!

“Mansur!! Come here quick!” shouted my mom. “And get a shoe!”
I sprang up from the sofa I was in watching TV. I spent a couple of seconds looking for the right kind shoe. Should I take my sandals? My dad’s work shoes? My Nike? My mom’s sandals? I didn’t care and picked up the one closest to me.

In my mom’s room, I saw her standing next to her book shelf. ON the shelf, there was a small lizard. The lizard was about the size of my small finger. It was a baby lizard, not the huge ones, where you can see the veins protruding from under their skin.

“Kill it Mansur!”
Sadly, I said, “Mom, I cannot!”

I left to get Raid, the effective pest killer. I sprayed a lot of Raid on the small lizard. I could not bear to get close to it. I feared that if I sprayed on it, the lizard would jump quickly and leap onto my face climbing into my mouth or my nose! I hated the thought of it. I sprayed so much of Raid; it was covered with a small layer of white foam. It was still moving, but was also dying. I could see closely the small heart beating rapidly. It is amazing how much you can see through their almost paper thin like skin. I had to eventually call in my dad to kill the lizard. He picked up the shoe and slammed it down on the insect and squashed it. I shivered for a few seconds. He took some tissue papers and grabbed it in his hands and threw it in the dustbin. The whole time he did this, I was as far away as I could be from him.

You see, lizards, cockroaches and spiders all scare me. Other insects are okay, but these three scare the life out of me. I do not know what caused to me to be so scared. I stay away from them. I can never bring myself to kill any of these insect in any way. I admire those people who so bravely stomp over a cockroach. I run away or get someone else to do it. I think it may have been one incident when I was young that may have caused me to fear such insects.

In our home, my father, mother, brother and I were about to go to sleep after having watched a movie on TV. When we got up, my brother noticed a huge cockroach on the wall. He alerted my dad, who got ready with his shoe. HE tried to hit but it moved rather quickly from one place to another. It scurried away into the next room. My whole family moved into the next room as well. There several attempts to kill the insect revealed something new to me. This cockroach can FLY!! I got scared. The more my father tried hitting it, the more it flew around the room. It was a big ugly cockroach, which had wings. I hated the color of such an insect and hated the body make up with antennas and spiky legs. My father still was trying to hit the cockroach, when suddenly, as it was flying in the room, the huge cockroach landed directly on my face. Keep in mind that I was only 6 years old. I had a small face. I could see the huge thing on my nose, climbing up to my forehead. I started screaming and panicking. I thought I was going to die. The cockroach walked up to my head, and I began to cry. What actually was a few seconds, seemed like eternity to me. Still today, I can see the cockroach climbing up my nose.

I also hate those huge spiders, which have hairy legs. The thought of it scares me and beings me to an almost near-panic situation if I would see one. Lizards have the same effects on me, especially the big ones, which are as big as a green chili.

I do not know what I can do to overcome my fear of these insects. I cannot even watch programs on Animal Planet when it is based on Spiders, Lizards or Cockroaches. Somehow, all other insects I can deal with and face them. In the spirit of “Lion, Tigers and Bears” from The Wizard of Oz, here I am singing off “Lizards, Spiders and Cockroaches, Oh My!!”

Yours being glad that the baby lizard is dead,

Mansur

The One Where I Was Impressed With Mohammad's Hospitality

Hey all,

I have to share with you about my recent trip to Medina. I last went to Medina back in 2002. That was over two years ago. Somehow, I always liked going to Medina more than going to Makkah. I think it has to do something with the fact that whenever I go to Medina I spend a night there. I also think that it is a more relaxed trip than a trip to Makkah, where one usually has to perform the pilgrimage or circumambulating around the Kabaa and walking seven times between the two hills.

We left on Thursday morning, and I had taken a day off from work. Six people packed into the Nissan Patrol: two in front, two in middle, and two in the back. My mom and I were in the middle. We also got our usual stick of water, drinks and other snack items. I also got several pillows which were rotated amongst the passengers.

The landscape evolved from flat barren desert to mountainous and green regions. It was so amazing to see such a transformation. I had forgotten that there were huge mountains. Someone one pointed out that the mountains are volcanic, and that was the reason why they were so black. Medina is towards North-West of Jeddah, and this particular region received rain in the last few days, which was why we were able to see more natural greenery than in Jeddah. Since we were all fasting we could not stop at a convenience store to get chocolates and soft drinks.

I am not going to bore with every details of the trip, but would rather tell you the highlights.

Medina has been historically known as a friendlier city than Makkah. Every one of the guests that we have received who went to Makkah and Medina, have said that they felt more welcome in Medina, and saw a definite change in the attitude of the people. History also testifies that when Prophet Muhammad had to flee Makkah, it was the people of Medina who received him with a warm welcome. It is interesting to note that among the early people of Medina, there were also some several tribes of Jews. How ironic that today Muslims are so anti-Jews.

On Thursday night at 330am, we were all invited to a Saudi’s family house for early morning breakfast (Suhoor). I was not in the mood, nor was my friend. The parents had to go. I was so glad I went. Upon entering the huge compound, which consisted of several houses, which we later realize were guest houses, we were driven into the main house. The women were whisked away to the side, and I was guided towards the main entrance. I met Mohammad at the main door, and talked to him in Arabic, asking him how he was doing. Inside the main entrance, there was a huge round table with flowers on top of it. I was led into the golden living room on my left.

In typical Saudi fashion, all the men were seated along the sides of the room, on chairs and sofas. I shook my hands with each one if them, saying Assalam-u-Alaikum, and Kayf Halak (Hello, and How Are You?) There were 12-13 people. The room was painted in yellow, with exquisite attention paid to the details. With the gypsum plaster décor on the ceiling, even some of that was painted in Gold. I was served the Qahwa, which I always take out of courtesy, because it is impolite to refuse, and just had a sip. The coffee tables were covered with golden covers, complete with golden accessories. The carpets were of several different kinds strewn about on the floor. The cushions were decorated with huge ribbons and bows, all of golden color. I was so thankful I was not going to be in this room the whole time otherwise I would have started seeing golden and yellow everywhere. The host said that the meal was ready, and we all walked out of the room into the huge lobby beyond the smaller lobby at the main entrance. From here there were huge staircases leading up to the first floor. We went into the small passageway, which opened up to a big bathroom, where the host asked if we wanted to wash our hands. We all did that.

Walking through the bigger lobby, around the staircase, I paid attention to the details. There were chairs place around the edges of the room, and even the chairs were decorated as if it were a piece from some antique museum. The huge dining room had a dining table for about 24 people. There was also a small comfortable sitting area at the end of the dining room. The tables and chairs and the shelves around the room were all ordered from Egypt. They were very loud and garish, and started to hurt the eyes after a while. The side tables were decorated with salads and desserts like one would see at a hotel buffet. The dining table itself was set out with all kinds of cutleries and glasses, as well as the food. Yes, the food!

There were two huge round plates, with a lamb in the middle surrounded with yellow rice. The smaller dishes included okra, appetizers and salads. The host, who went out of his way, served the main meal to everyone. He would always put more than one could eat. He made sure that we were well fed. That was how hospitable they were. I became impressed. No matter how much I refused to eat more, my plate was being filled up with more and more, so much so, the host put the entire brain of the lamb on my plate! Feeling so full and bloated from the main meal, we were offered desserts and juices and fruits. Most of the food was homemade and it was rather quite delicious. My favorite dish was the dessert which was the kunnafah. They even got us lemons, which they said was of the best kind and sliced it up for us. After the dinner, we went back to the golden living room, where we were given repeatedly more tea. There was only so much one could take, but the host felt it necessary to offer the tea.

What may seem overwhelming to you all, I was certainly impressed by the level of hospitality shown to me. I strained to remember when the last time was when someone really looked after me like the way Mohammad and his family did tonight. I could not think of anything. I felt so welcome, and I began to feel like as if I knew this family for a long time. Despite my broken Arabic, I still managed to get along with his conversation. I felt so welcome, I wanted to go to sleep right there on the sofa. Time came for us to leave. Mohammad kissed me on my cheeks, like the Arabs do as a sign of friendship and close relations, and said to me, “Mansur, we are like your brothers. Anytime you need anything, please let us know.” I was impressed. Here I am, visiting this house for the first time, and already I was offered so much friendliness. Sure, some people say nice things, but tonight, I knew that whatever Mohammad said, he meant it from his heart. And that is precisely what prompted me to write all about this.

On a more unfortunate note, my mom fell sick from the food. Everyone one else were ok.

The following day, we left Medina and went to Yanbu, which is a coastal city north of Jeddah. I slept for most of the way, but the drive was really interesting, with roads curving around the mountains. Fortunately, I was able to see some of the old ruins, which were abandoned and derelict houses from years ago, made from square stone blocks. IN Yanbu, there was a dinner, where I ate too much.

In Jeddah, the next day, before I could go to work, I threw up the entire meal I had eaten in Yanbu.

Yours having recovered now,

Mansur